Friday, March 20, 2009
Abusive Relationships: Where do you draw the line?
In a recent NY Times article, a couple high school girls were asked their opinion on the Chris Brown abusing Rihanna scandal. Alarmingly, these young girls blamed Rihanna for possibly provoking Chris Brown and justified his actions.
Are the young women of today becoming desensitized to abuse? Or have they lost the ability to recognize it as unacceptable regardless of the conditions?
The other set of young girls in the article put Rihanna down for taking Chris back. What they don't realize is that an abusive relationship has power; an intense grip that is difficult to even recognize sometimes, let alone get out of. The real truth is, no woman is exempt from being a victim of abuse and then taking the guy back. Even the most beautiful, successful, intelligent woman is prone to being controlled and abused without even realizing the danger of the situation. Due to a distorted self image, many of them blame themselves for the abuse.
A lot of people in abusive relationships think that they can change their partner. Many people in these unions somehow convince themselves that they can "fix" their partner. The alarming thing is that many abusers appear charming and sweet men on the outside. It is scary how young women continue to blame the victim because they are also caught up in the facade created by the abuser.
I think it is everybody's job, to inform young women that abuse of any form is intolerable, regardless of the circumstances. It is only through constant education and reinforcement that we can alter this notion that abuse is justified in certain cases.