Saturday, October 23, 2010

How Much of Writing to Share?

I've found that in pursuing anything creative, people either:

1.) Find you inspiring and admirable
2.) Think you're wasting your time

I have read a lot of blogs that are telling me that other people who are not writers will not understand despite how much they want to. I find this to be more and more true as time goes on. So many times, people have asked, "How is your book not done yet?" and I have to take a deep breath and patiently explain that the process takes much longer than I would have ever thought. There are instances where I even become defensive or feel like I am disappointing others (like, for example, when it is assumed that I am not really working).

I guess the main conclusion I have come to is that it is okay for people to not understand and to inquire. All I can do is find comfort in other writer friends (like the amazing ones I've met on the blogosphere), keep treading the path I have embarked on because in the end, it is exactly path, nobody else's.

Do you divulge your journey as a writer (or anything) to everyone? Or do you keep a lot of it to yourself?

"Writing is the only thing that, when I do it, I don't feel like I should be doing anything else."


  1. I keep most of it to myself when talking to non-writers. I have a few friends who'll ask how things are going, but if I start talking too much about revisions, etc. I can see the wrinkle in their forehead growing right before they ask "You're still working on that one? I thought it was done."

    So, unless directly asked, I usually don't talk too much to non-writers about my writing projects.

  2. I have people in my life who will tell me that writing is what I am meant to do but, when I tell them about the rejections or acceptances, they couldn't care less. It hurts me as these are people I'm close to.
    At least my husband is supportive. (No, he's not a writer.)

    I have had bad experiences with writing groups but I often wonder if I should try once more. It could be worth the false starts to have a group of people who understand.

  3. I used to talk about my writiing to non-writers. But that was before I developed a network of writing friends. Now I cringe when my non-writing friends ask me how the writing's going. For some reason I feel like they're judging me, even when they aren't.

    Besides, only my writer friends understand what I'm going through. And only my writer friends know how to be my cheerleaders. ;)

  4. You know I feel the same way, when people ask me how my Aerobics classes are going, for they know that, I don't have many students, for i live in place where it is difficult find to find students waiting in line to join my class.
    However I am not bothered whether i have enough number of students or not for I am very passionate about fitness, and I would be working out at least 3 times in a day to keep my self fit and also not to lose my stamina.
    Sometimes people who had been my students at one time or other would come and ask me "are still taking Aerobics classes?"
    Now why would I stop taking classes I cannot understand. And people will come up with all sorts of unsolicited advises as to how i can improve my classes, as if I have not thought and tried them out.
    I just nod my head and keep quiet, for it is no use talking to them about a subject they have no idea about.
    See even though i am not a writer like you, but, your thoughts resonate with i am going through my profession.
    I am happy doing what I am doing, and I don't care what others think or feel about it.

  5. I share those bits that I think other writers will relate to - the trails, the tricks and tips.

    I try not to share the wailing and gnashing of teeth, unless I can make it into an interesting post :)

  6. Great subject for this post! Dont even get me started, whenever I mention Im a writer, people give me that "looser" look.
    Its ok,I dont mind. Specially when my baby gets published. =) We gotta keep holding on, and trying not to let this affect us. I know, hard as hell.

  7. People are judgmental. If they're not writers, they don't understand the writing process. Hopefully most of us who do write know that we must find our own path, whether it be plotter or panster, quickly spit out hot mess or long first draft process, writing everyday or big gaps between writing, and so on.

    I find myself getting defensive when I have to explain why I don't have an agent or book out yet.

  8. I divulged it with a few of my friends, but though they were supportive, they didn't understand it, understand how difficult the journey can be. So though I'm not ashamed of writing and wanting to be a writer, I keep it to myself now. It's easier now, I think, especially with such a supportive online community where others *do* understand. :)

  9. In my personal life, I only talk about my writing with family and friends if they ask. However, I pummel my husband with updates. I know he doesn't really care, that he's just reading my books because I want him to, but it's still nice! I love my blog readers. They are all supportive and amazing :) I update Facebook with each blog post just to give people the option of being interested.

  10. Ah, it's so nice to know that I'm not the only one!

  11. I'm not sharing until I have something tangible to share. And even then not with everyone! :)

  12. I keep it to myself unless someone brings it up (they found my blog). Even then, I'm shy about it! I hardly FB about my writing stuff. Somehow I will feel better about it one day, but for now I'm kinda weird about it.