Sunday, December 5, 2010

Query Rejection




Last Friday, I received a query rejection. It wasn't dressed differently than any other rejections. There was a polite, declarative sentence. An encouraging closing. All in all, your standard run-of-the-mill rejection.

But, you know what's crazy? No matter how many times I have read that rejection is a part of the process, I still cannot seem to let one bounce off of my shoulders. It manages to pierce me the way nothing else can.

I'm not sure I will ever become used to it or if it will get easier with each one. I found myself drowning in dismal thoughts. Maybe I should give up. Maybe I'm not cut out for this after all. Maybe I'm not that great.

Of course, those emotions waned and then I reminded myself that this is more about tenacity than anything else. That to give up would mean saying good bye to hours of effort and love. That everyone goes through it and sometimes, it is a test of how hard we are willing to keep trying.

Then I pick myself up, take a break, and dive in head first again.

But wow, it still hurts.

17 comments:

  1. It really does. I'm with you on that - it hurts. But it's impossible not to go on!

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  2. Rejection gets easier the older one gets! It really does. I have done exactly what you say we should do: I've just kept trying!!!

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  3. That stinks, but I bet once some time passes, they won't sting quite as much. You'll never LIKE them, but I think it has to get easier eventually.

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  4. Oh no! I am sorry, hun!

    But , never giving up, will get you its rewards in the end :)

    Chin up!

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  5. It always hurts. The difference between the amateur and the pro is how long you wallow before moving on ;)

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  6. I liken it to a baseball game. Three strikes and you're out. BUT, there's always more chances to bat in the game, so keep on getting up there. One day you'll hit a home run. That's what this is all about. Keep on slugging for the fences.

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  7. Aw, thanks so much everyone!! I don't know what I'd do without you!!

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  8. Queries can, like nothing else, make us feel like our dream is hopeless. But we have to shake off the bad feeling, put the energy into our work, and shrug it off. Everyone has rejections. That is what we have in common with the greatest writers in the world.

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  9. Saumya, so fun to see your comment on my blog this morning, and I'm here with the others to offer encouragement. One thing a writer friend said to me recently that helped put things into perspective is, "Publication is not the only mark of success." In other words, it's a worthy goal, but the writing process itself is a gift. So cherish the whole journey, and see this one setback as just one more rock that is now behind you. :)

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  10. Thanks, Roxane! What your friend told you is so true and I feel a lot better about it. I'm excited to move forward.

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  11. Yup, you have to dive in again. Cry a few minutes (if it's worth it) and then forget about it. That's what I do, anyway. Actually, I hardly bother with tears over query rejections--personal rejections and bad reviews, sure, but a query rejection is not personal.

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  12. I hate query rejections! But you have to be persistent to be successful! Keep at it!

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  13. I am so with you. It never becomes less painful. But good for you for picking yourself back up. That's the important part!

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  14. I'm not at that stage yet, but it is a fear I definately have; rejectionitis. Especially when it's about something so close to your heart; I feel for you, babe. But keep plucking away, it WILL happen for you, I haven't any doubt.

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  15. I have had many and they do hurt.I allow myself a wallowing period--couple of hours and then move on. Glad you are!

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  16. Yes, it hurts. Nothing can take away that sting! Even those who are already published feel that way when they get rejections. You're not alone! Good for you for keeping at it. That's what will get you where you want to be!!!

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  17. You will get where you want to be, just have faith. I know, easier said than done but still. Great writers are found eventually!

    And just thank your lucky stars you didn't have to put up with trying to send out "Moby Dick"! Now that would have probably been something I would have given up on.

    Good work can, and does, get rejected. Believe in it. We're right here with you.

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