Left and Write Brained

how finding a romantic relationship is like finding an agent

2012-02-13T06:34:00.000-08:00

1. It can take many attempts to find the right match:
It took months of query letters and perusing through Jeff Herman's guide to narrow down who I'd submit to. It took another month to send out partials and fulls. I often went back and forth when it was time to make a decision. Who do I like more? Who will I be happy with in the future?

2. Chemistry is just as important as qualifications.
I ended up not accepting with an agent who I thought had everything I wanted. However, I learned that sometimes the busier agents are just that. Busier. I knew that I needed someone who could take the time to help me refine my manuscript, someone who was as eager to help me as other clients. I had a list of pertinent questions, including Where do you see this going? Why is this worth your investment? How will you make this the best it can be?
You see, "big" agents are wonderful but they often have other clients that are first priority. Also remember that many fresh agents have a priceless hunger. I looked at background, experience in sales, other agents in the agency, but most importantly, passion for the manuscript.

3. Sometimes the best one comes from unexpected places.
Some rejections are an opportunity in disguise. One agent who rejected me passed me on to another agent, who ended up making an offer.

4. You have to be happy with yourself before you can be happy in a partnership.
You owe it to yourself to edit your manuscript until it seems excessive.
My personal time line:
-2009: began first draft
-2010: realized first draft wasn't written well, got suggestion from an agent to rewrite
-halfway through 2010: began rewriting, attended conferences
-2011: shared draft with critique partner, finished it halfway through the year
-halfway through 2011: revised, revised, revised...went through around 20 rounds of edits
-end of 2011: sent out at least 5 queries a week

What have you learned through your journey?

quote of the moment

2012-02-11T07:39:00.000-08:00

"I wish I were stronger and more secure in myself so that I could really spend my life with a guy like Lenny. Because he has a different kind of strength than Joshie. He has the strength of his sweet tuna arms. He has the strength of putting his nose in my hair and calling it home. He has the strength to cry when I go down on him. Who IS Lenny? Who DOES that? Who will ever open up to me like that again? No one. Because it's too dangerous. Lenny is a dangerous man. Joshie is more powerful, but Lenny is much more dangerous."
— Gary Shteyngart

you can handle it

2012-02-10T20:18:00.000-08:00

In response to some e-mails, I'll be writing more about my agent journey in later posts. Today, I wanted to share some words of encouragement. A thought crept into my mind last week:

There isn't anything that comes to you that you can't handle.

Maybe it's the time of year but it seems like there are a lot of posts around the blogging world about people flirting with the idea of giving up or moving on. Instead of using our setbacks to make us doubtful, maybe we can use them to make us humble. Maybe they can just be reminders of how much we have left to do, if we're willing to put forth the effort.

I only say this because there have been many moments throughout my life that have felt dark and hopeless. Looking back, I see that they had one thing in common: they were transient. I know I often take on the optimistic, everything's-perfect approach but the truth is, many days are difficult to just get through and I can often understand why writers suffer from depression. Sometimes it takes effort just to get by.

But perhaps that's often half the battle: getting by. Not allowing things to crumble what got you started in the first place.
So if you're reading this and are in a place of doubt, please refresh. Nobody said this would be easy but you can handle it.

News and uh, the stuff after the news

2012-01-29T17:40:00.000-08:00

Hey all,
I wanted to let you know that I've officially gotten an agent. :)
Rather, I'm represented by Elizabeth Kracht of Kimberly Cameron Associates.
The past couple of months have been a whirlwind with phone calls and tough decisions. I ended up not accepting with someone who I thought would be the agent of my dreams and sending fulls to places I was sure would laugh at me. In the end, I chose with the best of both worlds for my personal taste: great chemistry and experience.
I know I'm working with a talented, charismatic, and driven woman. She gets my work and me. I couldn't be happier.
If you'd like more information on this hunt, feel free to ask in the comments or e-mail me.

Before I go into any more detail, there are some incredible people I need to thank:

Laura, my first writer friend in the blogging world. I'm lucky enough to now call her my critique partner. Laura has given me the most insightful feedback I could ask for. She spent a lot of time getting to know my characters and letting me know what was working and what wasn't. I'm sure a lot of you can relate to that connection and gratitude that occurs without even "meeting" someone.

Margo, an always compassionate and kind blogger who also went through my (too many) pages. Margo gave me encouragement when I was pretty close to calling it quits. She continues to be one of my favorite bloggers.

Rachna and Gargi-for going through my first chapters. Those are the ones I rewrote the most! Their reactions were valuable to me before I sent out those partials and fulls.

Lydia, for answering my questions about agent-author etiquette and other things. As a physician, writer, mother, and much more, she's a role model for me in many ways.

Now for part 2:
I'd like to do a giveaway (sort of):
-The first 4 people who are followers and leave a comment will get a query critique.
All of my research has taught me a lot about querying and I'd love to share in any way that I can.
I limited it to 4 because I want to give my best to each one.

because quotes say it best

2012-01-22T12:52:00.000-08:00

The more scared we are of a work or calling,

the more sure we can be that we have to do it.

-the war of art

thoughts to pass along...

2012-01-16T20:53:00.000-08:00

Within the next couple of posts, I wanted to share some good news and a giveaway. Until then, I thought I'd leave you with some thoughts that have come my way. Some my own; some from people far more talented than myself.

1. An article stating that novels are written so we feel less lonely.

2. It's important to give as much credit to your failures as you do your successes. This past weekend in NYC reminded me that my year "off", probably seen as a failure by many in my educationally traditional community, was the happiest time of my life. I was often freezing, with the wind curling itself under my coat. I struggled to piece past and future together and assumed the role of a twenty-something year old cliche. But I fit into myself. That one truth will make that the most fulfilling year I've ever lived.

3. How much posting is too much on social networks? This piece explores the question. What do you use your social networks for? I ask this because I've gotten a suggestion to be more, er, active on my Twitter. I don't want to post just for the sake of posting (doesn't that annoy people??) and would love to hear how you use your tools!

4. If you enjoy writing, have you considered making a screenplay? The Golden Globes planted this question
(P.S. Favorite dresses: Anjelina's and Sophia Vergara's from Modern Family)

5. This last thought isn't a thought at all but rather a gaze backwards.

I had another uplifting weekend with Samir and when I called him after my flight home, he said, "I guess it's back to crappy reality now, huh?"
"No," I insisted. "Back to drudgery. You're my reality."
I used to not want to believe that our weekends---our secured pockets of time---were real because they made us so happy. But they form the blueprint for my future more than anything in my day to day life does. Sometimes reality can visit in spurts.

stop caring about them

2012-01-09T07:58:00.001-08:00

Yes, I said it. Stop caring about the questions from others. Stop caring about what people will think if you haven't reached X and Y goal by 2012. Sometimes I think so many of our problems are caused by reactions from others. I've realized I need to whittle down my focus to where it matters. If I calculate every gesture based on its external output from people, I'll never be liberated. Perhaps too much of my time is wasted on worry, a malfunctioning emotion.

Some examples of what I'm referring to:

"Why does it seem like so and so doesn't like me? I didn't do anything."
-People are allowed to not like you. They are allowed to be mean. You are allowed to step away from ever interacting with them.

"Oh no, if I tell people I love writing I have to explain what I've done and they probably won't get it."
-It isn't theirs to understand anyway.

"What will this agent think about my manuscript?"
-If an agent isn't passionate about the work, it's time for a revision---on the agent search or the manuscript.

"I've been working at this for so long and there's nothing to show for it to anyone."
-The only thing that art promises is the pleasure of pursuing it. It's difficult, risky, and grueling.

on women

2012-01-09T07:49:00.000-08:00

This isn't one of those girlfriends-are-forever type posts. No, I've learned that friendships can screw you over and break your heart just as much (if not more) than any romantic relationship can. As we get older, we place time and value in those who matter. If we're lucky, we're reminded of how much there is to appreciate.

But I do have to ramble about the presence of some wonderful women in my life. Women who side with one another, who defy those stereotypes of cattiness and what not. Women who can bask in compliments, not cower when they're bestowed on another. Women who handle their insecurity with humility.

Favorite, recent examples:

* A few of us got together to catch up on our struggles, triumphs, and everything in between. One of the girls is ready for 2.5 kids now. Another never wants to be married. There was an utter absence of judgment, something that was never the case in our mothers' generation.

*Then there's the refreshing honesty. We were talking (ok, gossiping) about a not-very-nice guy.
"He's...okay," I said, trying to be diplomatic.
My friend shook her head. "No, he's a little bitch. That's really all there is to it."

Or how another girlfriend responded when I didn't forgot to return her calls:
"I'm telling you this because I love you...I'm mad at you."

Courage for 2012

2011-12-31T16:15:00.000-08:00

I hope that 2012 gives you courage:

-the courage to fail
-the courage to let go of those who disappoint you
-the courage to remodel and restart projects
-the courage to write
-the courage to keep going
-the courage to give others a chance
-the courage to love and be vulnerable

**2011 was saturated with the highest of highs and lowest of lows (I suppose that's how these bundles of time tend to be). I ended my first novel and some long standing friendships. I felt the uplifting current of true love, of a man who makes me want to be more than I thought I could be. I met giving people who are always willing to help. I traveled to northwest Africa and places in my mind I never thought existed. I formed concrete ideas about what kind of doctor, writer, and humanitarian I hope to be someday. I accepted this transitional, uncertain place I'm often in (it may simply be a part of me).

With each year, we add colors to ourselves, and I hope all of you get the happiness and success you deserve in 2012!
-

quotes

2011-12-29T23:11:00.000-08:00

In light of everyone sharing their resolutions for 2012, I wanted to share some quotes I found on pinterest (if you click on them, they'll be easier to read).

50th birthday celebration

2011-12-28T23:19:00.000-08:00

Surprising my mom will never get old...

what's on your reading list?

2011-12-27T15:31:00.001-08:00

I just finished reading and raving over Alex Cavanaugh's CassaStar (it's delightful!); now it's on to Talli Roland's Build A Man! I'm so lucky to have blogging friends who write novels.

on falling in love

2011-12-23T16:19:00.001-08:00

Do you remember the first time you fell in love---with someone, something?

I've done a lot of looking back over this break and realized that I've used that phrase often throughout my life, unaware of how fluid it is.

When I was younger, I was that little girl who always had a book. My parents tried to make me play outside with the other "normal" kids but I found solace in characters. I didn't know it at the time but my lifelong romance with words had already begun. The current remained---throughout my diary entries, position as high school newspaper editor, and swelling book collection---but I didn't realize that it all stemmed from the same love.

When my relationship ended with my first "boyfriend", (I put that in quotes because we had the say-hi-in-between-middle-school-classes kind of relationship), I thought I was in love because of the pain I felt. Now I know that I mistook youthful pangs of failure for love. Truthfully, I mistook a lot of things---jealousy, insecurity, friendship--- for romantic love in the years that followed. It's only since I've been with Samir that I know love; not just the process of climbing into or out of it but swaying with it. Love is something that now augments every facet of my life, something that I fit into, something that makes things easier and despite its irrationality, still makes so much sense.

So I suppose that for some situations, love can be there all along while during others, it can be a destination and journey rolled in one.

yes, another Audrey post

2011-12-22T16:03:00.000-08:00

I've written about my love for Audrey before. The other night, I saw her in the movie Funny Face. In this role, she was bookish, vulnerable, and flawed. My sister and I became lost in the romantic musical and I was reminded of why I'll always love these movies. They are as charming as they are innocent, as whimsical as they are wholesome. I can't think of a movie today that compares to any of the ones from this decade.

As my sister said, "They just don't make 'em like they used to."

Pendulum

2011-12-19T12:05:00.000-08:00

Do you ever find yourself oscillating between two extremes? Fear and confidence? Apathy and love?

Last week, thanks to finals, all I could do was live at school, study, and eat unhealthy food. Since I've been home, all I can do is sleep, watch television, and eat unhealthy food.

Perhaps I need these days of "nothing" to recover from my days saturated with "somethings." I think I make the mistake of piling too much on my plate and then allowing it all to drown me.

I'm realizing it boils down to one flaw: I suck at doing nothing. It's an art form that I need to cultivate. When I'm in front of the television, I feel like I should be writing. When I'm perusing blogs, I feel like I should be studying. There's always something.

Stress, like beauty, might be in the eye of the beholder. Learning how to say no, not caring as much about what other people are going to say, and devoting myself to causes I believe in can all help me live in that space between extremes. A space I can make a home in.

Query Letter Tips

2011-12-17T15:17:00.000-08:00

1. Don't start with a generic question, like "What would you do if everything you believed in disappeared?"

2. Research the agencies before hand. Most of them have websites and will specifically list what they are and are not looking for. It also helps to include how you found them and what other books of theirs caught your interest.

3. Work on making a good hook (or intro sentence). Get a fresh set of eyes to look over it. Work on it again. That first sentence is often the most difficult.

4. Study jacket flaps of novels you enjoy to see how they hooked you in a few hundred words or less. Using specific descriptions helps. For example, I initially described my protagonists's life as "strict" and "planned". When I took that out and instead mentioned her "compulsive list making", it made for a tighter sentence.

5. Don't include secondary characters and plotlines! Only your protagonist should be saving the day.

6. Include the word count and specific genre.

P.S. I'll be resuming regular writing and non-writing posts tomorrow! Sorry I was absent the past week. Finals and other projects kept me caffeinated and cranky.

If I Knew Then What I Know Now Part 2....

2011-12-07T12:10:00.000-08:00

Today, I'm a quarter century old. So, since I can officially say that I am at the right age for a quarter life crisis, I thought it'd be fun to reflect and do another "if I knew then" post. Here it goes:

1. Sift through old diary entries. Take that scared girl who writes them and push her away from herself, so she can become who she needs to be.

2. When striking up a conversation, ask more about the person and speak less about yourself. Everyone appreciates it when someone takes interest in them.

3. The things that your mother pushes you for might have more to do with her than you. They're always in your best interest.

4. Stop comparing any part of your life to anyone else's. We really are on different paths and that's the whole point.

5. It's great to do well in school but don't let it define you. Be careful about the actions that define you.

6. Don't stay in a relationship because it's good enough. Sometimes there's nothing more lonely than good enough.

7. Make tiny changes for a big difference. Wake up a few minutes earlier. Eat whole grains. Walk.

8. Your emotions, the very things that will allow you to connect with others, may often become hindrances if you aren't careful. Remember that it won't help you to be too sensitive.

9. Everyone has the right to their own opinion. Everyone is allowed to love or hate you.

10. Don't give up because things don't work out. You'll spend years studying to be a doctor so why would becoming a writer be any different? There's always space for improvement and sometimes, rejections are there to tell you that.

P.S. Talli Roland's novel, Build A Man, is launching today! Congrats, Talli! I'm so excited to read and review :)

Cleopatra

2011-12-07T12:05:00.000-08:00

Picture from here

As much as I admire the elegance and pearl-wearing grace of Audrey and Jackie O, I also have a soft spot for women like Cleopatra. The kind who may sometimes be a bit too much, who have confidence evaporating from their pores, and are bold enough to be disliked. The kind who reshape the world with their disposition.

If I knew then what I know now...

2011-11-28T13:42:00.001-08:00

Given the chance, what would you tell your old self?
Here are some things that crossed my mind this week...

1. Value the people in your life but make peace with cutting certain people out. It's not a friendship if it's draining. Toxicity is contagious.

2. Lists are important but the things that need to get done will get done. Don't obsess about things that don't deserve your obsession.

3. Hiding behind loose, baggy clothing doesn't make you look more intelligent. It shows that you aren't valuing yourself. There's a difference between comfort and complacency.

4. It's okay to enjoy every piece of chocolate from a bag of Doves. Don't allow them to pave a guilty road.

5. Drink a lot of water and eat fiber each day. And find the best moisturize for your skin.

6. Be careful with judgment. It will disappear when you're in terrible predicaments.

7. Sometimes going further away from the people you love---family, friends---will bring you closer to them. Everyone needs space to prosper.

8. You'll never regret traveling to an unfamiliar corner of the world alone. Take many solitary bus rides through foreign countries.

9. Cultivate a taste for good food and wine. Your body will thank you for it.

10. Remember it's okay to act your age. You'll waste a lot of time looking forward and planning.

writers can excite us in many ways

2011-11-27T18:45:00.000-08:00

Have you ever wondered what makes something great? How does a piece of work compel us to call it "amazing" or "okay" or "worthy"? Well, I've learned that it can't be whittled down to a single trait. Over this break, I've lost myself in a book by Nicole Krauss: The History of Love. For anyone who hasn't read her work and is looking for a new author, she is worth checking out. While I was happily anti social and curled up on a chubby armchair, I asked myself what made her novel compelling and how other authors can do that for their works.

With an engaging plot

Literary fiction is known for "slower" plots than its commercial counterpart, but as my blogging friend Margo once aptly put it, literary fiction packs in a lot of "micro tension". In The History of Love, the plot jumps around in time and the protagonist also shifts; however, what there isn't in continuous page turning events there is in mental conflict and mystery.

With gorgeous, gossamer words

"He learned to live with the truth. Not to accept it, but to live with it. It was like living with an elephant. His room was tiny, and every morning he had to squeeze around the truth just to get to the bathroom. To reach the armoire to get a pair of underpants he had to crawl under the truth, praying it wouldn't choose that moment to sit on his face. At night, when he closed his eyes, he felt it looming above him. ”

With characters who are easy to empathize with

Leo, the main character, has experienced a lot of loss when it comes to his family.We may not live in the same time period as him but all of us can relate to the feelings of love, hope, and heartbreak.

belated gratitude list

2011-11-25T19:47:00.000-08:00

Modern Family marathons with my modern and conservative family
Men's styled button downs
All of the unread books waiting to be picked up
Grilled cheese and avocado sandwiches
Shopping bags being stacked in the backseat, wrinkled with possibility
Sheets warm from the dryer
Warmth of cinnamon
The New York Times homepage
Black Friday madness
Giant mugs
Fluffy socks
My rebellious sister and introspective brother; my driven father and vivacious mother
The spices of chai and peppermint as they hit my tongue
Confusion's ability to guide me in surprising directions
The hazy intersections between writing and medicine; intimacy and independence

the importance of being selfish

2011-11-22T15:54:00.001-08:00

"Yes" isn't just a single syllable. It's a slippery slope, an unquenchable hunger. This past year, one thing I've been able to do is say no more often. It's been a challenge in many ways. For once, I have to explain myself. "Oh, you can't do it? Why? You always can." I understand. I've built the space for these expectations and am now filling it with an "I can't" instead of what it's used to. But I've realized that time is too easily depleted and that each of us is entitled to our own piece of it. When "yes" comes in the way of adequate sleep and sanity, it's time for a shift.
So while I am thankful for so many things---great family, friends, and food---today, I'll place my gratitude on the power of "no."

2011-11-21T16:01:00.000-08:00

Writing the beginning of the end

2011-11-15T08:21:00.000-08:00

Since I posted about the elements of the beginning, I thought I'd include a nice list of what should be in the "dark moment" or that crucial part before the ending.
by Alicia Rasley

The 5 Ds of the Dark Moment:

Dilemma-- the situation has disintegrated around the protagonist, and all seems lost.

Desperation-- the protagonist flails about, considering the most extreme escapes from the dilemma.

Despair-- the protagonist surrenders to despair, certain that there is no way out.

Deconstruction-- in the calm that follows despair, the protagonist begins to analyze the situation, deconstructing needs, values, and options.

Decision-- the protagonist decides what can be discarded, and what's most essential to be kept, and determines a course to achieve that.

Inspiration in pictures

2011-11-15T08:16:00.001-08:00

via pinterest.com

What should happen in the beginning?

2011-11-09T11:42:00.000-08:00

November means that the blogging world is hushed. Too hushed for those of us who aren't doing NaNoWriMo. But since I'm sure so many of you are working on your white, crisp starts, I thought I'd include a list of components for the beginning of a novel. (I got this from Charlotte Dillon's website).
I've read sites that recommend the "beginning" to occupy the first 25% of your book.

Starts on the brink of change.

Introduces the protagonist and provides a glimpse of his/her character, goal, and conflict.

Sets up the world of the book.

Shows "before" of the world and the protagonist, what they're like before the story events.

Hints at backstory, or at least indicates there is some relevant backstory.

Initiates the situation of the story.

Shows the inciting incident that starts the plot.

Sets up the major story questions (external, internal, interactional) and probably poses the external story question.

Initiates the external conflict.

Hints at the internal conflict.

Shows the start point of the central relationship.

Ends with the inevitability of change.

just a thought on patience

2011-10-31T18:53:00.000-07:00

It's important to be patient when you know something's ahead and it's just a matter of time. But what about with those uncertain things? I think they may test patience in an entirely different way because we don't always know what we're even being patient for. A rejection? A setback? A necessary restart?

Think about it: you send a query or an invitation of any kind. You feel it work through the wires of cyberspace as it lodges itself into the home of another. But what control is there beyond that? You know where you're sending it but do you really know where it'll go?

Sometimes it's a blessing to hand over control, to know when to surrender and relish your limits. Sometimes the universe is demanding that you exchange the fear of uncertainty with the strength of patience.

If there's one thing my early twenties has shown me so far, it's that I often have trouble exhibiting certain virtues when they are the most necessary.

questions that helped during revisions

2011-10-24T13:07:00.001-07:00

Revisions are the equivalent of a long run for me. The difficult part is doing it. The results afterward? So worth it! Then comes the itch; you know, the one that keeps it on your mind, convinces you that there's always improvement to make. It's an addictive tug of endorphins, a back and forth pendulum for the perfectionist.

I decided to look at other novels in depth to help my own revisions. (I studied three books out of my genre and three within.) Here are some of the things that I jotted down:

1. We've read that each chapter should contribute to the plot but from what I read, that isn't enough. And how about those books where we have skipped through the sagging middles just so they end already?
The main questions I asked (and answered yes to, when reading good books) was:
If I skip this chapter, will I miss an event that happened to the character? Will I be confused later on in the book because something crucial occurred here and only here? Can I write in a single sentence what this event was in each chapter?

2. Laura, my amazing critique partner, helped me understand the importance of tension. I had to do a lot of reading and revising to understand what that truly meant. These questions have helped me so far:

The character has choices to make. What will she lose if she goes for A over B? In other words, what is at stake for her?
Are there hints to secrets or unexplained plots that make me want to keep going?
Does the reader feel pressure and conflict pushing the character in a certain direction? Is there a push and pull (even if it's all internal)?

3. Last is the crucial element of change. Even if the world of the character stays the same, there has to be something that changed. Otherwise, what's the point of the novel?
For this, I looked at the first two and last two chapters of the books.
Are the characters in the same relationships?
Did the change come as a steady progression throughout the novel or did the ending seemed rushed and eager to tie up any loose knots?

just to share...

2011-10-23T20:09:00.000-07:00

"I believe that happy girls are the prettiest girls"
-Audrey Hepburn

Also for your viewing pleasure,

-An article about how some writers got their starts and the role New York played:
http://nymag.com/nymetro/news/media/features/n_8974/index1.html

-"Art is making truth out of lies":
a video using digital magic to make a lovely point
http://www.ted.com/talks/marco_tempest_the_magic_of_truth_and_lies_on_ipods.html

Using a love for books and words as decoration

2011-10-10T14:36:00.000-07:00

In my new apartment, I wanted to incorporate my love for words, books, writing, etc. in a way that added to the decoration without being overwhelming.

Typewriter keys in a picture frame (until I get a real one someday!)

Gah, sorry for the glare! The New Yorker magazine has some gorgeous and meaningful covers (check out this one in memory of Steve Jobs). I found a Jane Austen cover that matched the rest of my apartment and blew it up to 8 X 10.

I found these gorgeous candles at Target and paired them with black candlesticks from Michaels. The picture is from my last plane ride leaving New York City. I tinted it pink to match the other splashes of color in my living room (my color scheme is black, white, and pink).

Blurry picture but hopefully you can see that I used a thin stack as a support for a photo. It looks wonderful if you happen to have books that are in the same color palette!

During my next break, I hope to sew a quote on a pillow cover or two and frame a Sylvia Plath poem.

what's in your workspace?

2011-10-08T14:26:00.000-07:00

I love learning about what keeps people motivated. Over the years, one correlation I've picked up is that between the clutter in my desk and mind. That happens a lot in writing: a bleeding between life and the product. In a matter of seconds, my motivation can go from steadfast to paper thin, able to disappear with a strong enough gust of wind.
Here are some things that keep it intact:

Chocolate-no explanation necessay
Post Its- for list fanatics everywhere
Sharpie pens-they won't bleed through! they write well!
Note cards- I love using different colors to jot down details about characters, scenes, etc.

Starbucks coaster- Two years ago, I saw a man making these in the West Village. The weather had an impending coldness to it, as though it was telling me things were about to change.
I picked the coaster up as a promise to finish every writing endeavor I started. It's more a symbol than anything else. Of course, it's faithfully endured the weight of many cups of coffee!

What helps you get to work?

P.S. That fat book in the back is Jeff Herman's Guide to Publishing. It has listings of agents and publishers. I highly recommend it to anyone in the query stage!

Music

2011-10-06T14:35:00.000-07:00

Sometimes when I listen to certain songs, I get pangs of nostalgia for someone I never was. Their free spirited, no-nonsense nature compels me to be guided by my own desires, instead of the ones that were taught to me.

I'll remember that I loved some plans because they gave me an ending. Not a happy one. Not even a so-so one. Just an ending. So I clutched them with a committed grip, not understanding that their appeal was transient.

I'll forget that happiness and sadness often flow through the same pore. By closing off the door to one, I do that to the other.

Then the songs will end and I'm reminded that I'll never fully understand. Ever.
And that may just be the point after all.

we need each other

2011-10-01T14:42:00.000-07:00

This past week, I read a wonderful article by Atul Gawande about the importance of coaching. When we do anything for a long time, we become zoomed in, unable to view it objectively. His main question: who says that years of doing something means that we can't receive external criticism? In my med school, we receive feedback every three weeks on how well we contribute and synthesize knowledge, work with others, interact with patients, etc.

This concept applies to writing as well. Of course there are those writers who disappear for months from society, to an exotic beach, and prefer to remain isolated. But how easy is it to become so absorbed in your work--in anything--- that you can no longer see its flaws? One of the many reasons I'm anticipating feedback on my novel is because I'll finally see (and be able to correct) the gaps it has.

Connecting with others also teaches me how much I have to learn. For example, Laura helped me realize that I didn't even know the different between Young Adult (typically ages 13-18) and Middle Grade (8-12)! It was embarrassing, considering how much time I spend in the world of fiction. But I'm glad I could refresh myself on all the genres (children's, middle grade, young adult, upmarket, adult, etc.).

So, yes, I wouldn't get far with my writing if it wasn't for the connections I've established with other people. Isn't that one of the many benefits of blogging? Making that bond with other people who share the same goals, struggles, and victories?

On a final--and overdue-- note, Laura, my fabulous critique partner, had an interview on Open Beast magazine. She talks about her writing inspirations, cute love story, and more! Congratulations, Laura!!

tips to get through an overwhelming week...

2011-09-25T11:53:00.000-07:00

We've learned in school that some amount of stress is necessary to getting things done. But who ever has that ideal amount?? Please speak up now if you're one of the lucky ones! Most of us are on the other side. The overwhelming, suffocating, there-aren't-enough-hours-for-me-to-even-look-presentable side. I've been reading a lot of posts about people not finding enough time to do what they need or want to, so I thought I'd make a list (of course, another list) of what has helped me.

1. Music. Our ears can become as bored as any other part of our body. Switching up play lists, listening to covers of popular songs by other artists, and trying out new genres helps keep me stimulated while I work.

2. A new bounce in that morning (or afternoon and evening) drink. Cinnamon in coffee? A little whipped cream? A new tea? Pumpkin spice goodness?

3. Reminders. The more I grow up, the more I believe that happiness is an active, not passive, process. I need to remind myself how much there is to be grateful and happy for.

4. Hide. Like Hell. Yes, this seems to be necessary. I don't mean disappear for hours so that a search party begins but to take a couple of (or thirty) minutes, whether that's in the car or bookstore, to just breathe deeply. I duck into a coffee shop in the break time between classes to scribble down some notes for writing. Or I write for a bit before going into bed, making it a part of my nighttime routine.

5. Plan something to look forward to. A lunch or Skype date with a friend? A DVR'd television show? If you're lucky, a mini vacation?

P.S. For any ladies who can't always wash, dry, and style their hair, dry shampoo has become my new best friend.

it's okay to feel like crap

2011-09-18T18:41:00.001-07:00

Do you ever have moments---or days--when things just seem to drag? The to-lists are endless. There's always something that's not happening, whether it's groceries or an assignment. My desires become contradictory during times like these: one part of me can't stop panicking while the other wants to run away and take a long nap. Today, for the first time, I indulged in the latter. And guess what? The nap was a great boost and I realized, it's just as important to write "do nothing" on that to-do list. It may be ironic but allowing myself do nothing helps me do many things after wards.

Do you ever get a chance to schedule time away from everything just to be with yourself?

did negative words ever push you in a positive direction?

2011-09-10T12:51:00.000-07:00

People say a lot about how to handle the negative things we've been told. "Forget it and just remember the nice ones," they say, or "Those who are close to you know what you're really like or what you can really do."

But I wonder if at times, I can credit the negative words for pushing me in a positive direction. Three years ago (can't believe it's been that long!) an agent read fifty pages at my attempt at a novel. This was a fragment of six months of hard work. Six months that nobody in my world seemed to understand, to top it off: I had just decided to take some time off to write, without any promise or potential, and everyone in my life seemed to have a discouraging thing to say about it.

"This just doesn't read like fiction," she said when we spoke on the phone. "You need a writing class." Her tone was withdrawn and straight-to-business. So was my crying that followed.

But in the coming months, I saw that she was right. It didn't read like fiction at all. Hard work and effort didn't mean that the product was worthy.

Then I think of something that happened in fifth grade. My teacher told my mom that I wouldn't amount to anything in life. I can see where she was coming from: we had just moved to the area and I missed all my old friends and didn't concentrate in school, I also stopped socializing, and wasn't athletic. Looking back, all I can think is, "what a terrible thing to say about any fifth grader!" But at the time, my mom conveying those words back to me pushed me to prove her wrong.

Anyway, I think that "negativity" of any sort could just be a positive message in disguise. So maybe it isn't about negative or positive but rather, what we do with it.

on what makes success and a lovely indian wedding (in pictures)

2011-09-06T14:18:00.000-07:00

Two things to share:

1. My friend told me he read a book that stated successful people tend to constantly think of how much they have left. I disagreed. While there is importance in that, the problem is how the book is defining success in the first place. Or rather, how success is defined in general. Sometimes it's too focused on the tangible. But if we are always looking forward, I don't think we are giving the past and present enough significance.
I met so many people this past weekend who told me their dream was to write a book. It made me think of all my blogger friends, who are spending their days pursuing things that others may leave to theory at the moment. Relish in that. It takes courage and action.

2. Another friend, one of my closest ones from college, married her true love. I've been to many wedding but this was the first good friend's one and it was surreal really, to see such an amazing person's dreams unfold right in front of me. The joy bled to everyone close to her and made the entire weekend a constant celebration, even when we weren't in a ceremony. (Indian weddings have a lot of events...I'm talking several days worth.)
By the end, we were exhausted in the best way possible.

The gorgeous bride during her mendhi (henna) ceremony.

Group picture right after the wedding

During the reception

With my college roommates :)

Stuff Needs to Be Happening (notes)

2011-08-21T11:35:00.000-07:00

This was the most recent piece of advice I received from an agent:
"Stuff needs to be happening."
It was in response to my first 100 pages, where I thought things were happening even though to an outside reader, they weren't.
So on Friday, I went through some novels and took notes.

How to Make Stuff Happen:

-This tip came from Laura: make scene cards (one card per scene) that lists a quick summary of the scene, the characters in it, and how it's moving the plot forward.

-In one of the books I went through, exposition didn't begin until the second or third chapter. When it did, it always related back to what was happening in the present.

-A character's subplots can be woven in through a single event (ex. She is having trouble with a co-worker and her marriage and deals with both at a work party)

-Conflict also comes in levels. There are overarching conflicts but each scene should have a mini conflict related to that larger one.

-Alluding to a secret keeps a reader interest

-Society can be as big of a character as anyone. It can provide pressure, expectations, and development.

How do you make sure things are happening in your work?

4 thoughts to finish up the week

2011-08-21T11:20:00.001-07:00

1. Did you know that Starbucks has drinks not listed on the menu? Samir sent me this article about them. (There's a "short" size, a zebra drink that is a mix of white and regular mocha, and a "dirty" chai, to name a few.)

2. Contentment, in its truest sense, seems to be independent of any other factors. There may be piles of work (and laundry), disappointments of all sorts but somehow, I still can be okay. It has a way of doing that; settling and refusing to leave.

3. Some dreams are there to be...well, to just be. They're allowed to have a resting place and not much else.

4. This one comes from my cousin. After I came back from Africa, I was determined to start another project, some way of trying to save the world. We ended up having to work on a final article in New York. For a week, I spent all of my time not writing with Samir. Then I met with my cousin and told him I was ashamed of being "that girl", the one who is always hanging out with her man.

"Why?" He asked.
"I don't know...just...because," I said.
"Because you were drawn to what made you happy for a week of your life? What's wrong with that again?"
It was such a simple question but it put me in my place. What is wrong with that?

Loneliness

2011-08-16T18:17:00.000-07:00

Picture from weheartit.com

Loneliness has always been one of the most fascinating emotions to me. Maybe because I've rarely ever felt it. That painful tug and frightening silence. It tends to creep out when loved ones leave after a visit or a friend moves away. If it had a smell, I'd imagine it would be akin to stale coffee or neglected flowers.

People discuss wanting to visit certain places but I often feel that way about certain emotions, especially loneliness. Okay, that's probably not credible coming from who a.) is a serial monogamist and b.) becomes friends with characters in books.

But maybe it does have something to do with reading. Maybe I haven't put myself to the "real test" even though I live by myself. You know, stretches of time without any technology a.k.a. connection to others, books, or piles of work. Writing is a solitary process yet it somehow occupies all of my voids, so nothing seems to be missing. Does that even make sense?

Later next year, I'll be going to a silent meditation camp. Ten days of complete isolation and NO speaking. Crazy? Yes. Perhaps the only way of going truly inside is by eliminating any roads that lead outside.

Have you ever wanted more of a certain emotion?

how to add tension to our work (4 points)

2011-08-14T21:29:00.000-07:00

Tension: an often unpleasant thing in our daily lives but a necessary ingredient in our writing (funny how that works, right?)

Tension is the one thing that I need more of in my work. I get that suggestion from the wonderful Laura and from anyone else who has read fragments of my recently completed novel.

I've been hunting the Internet for help on tension and also took some notes from a recent (and extremely helpful) phone conversation. So, here it goes:

1. In a nutshell, a storyteller creates a character who can't refuse to act because of the cost of inaction, but there's also a price to pay for acting.

2. Obstacles create tension. Ask: What does my main character want? What is preventing he or she from getting it?

3. Another way to generate tension is to begin a story with a character wrestling with a dilemma (which can be mainly internal or external). If a plot event forces that character to act to resolve their dilemma, the story begins with a question -- what will the character do -- and moves toward an answer to that question.

If that step resolves the original dilemma, but creates a new, larger problem that requires another step forward, the story continues to advance.

4. Romeo, in Romeo and Juliet, is a great example of narrative tension. To act on his love for Juliet is to turn against his clan and family; to not act on his feelings for Juliet is to violate his sense of what's important to him. But any action he takes increases his pain.

(Source: http://www.storyispromise.com)

How do you add tension to your work?

Brian Andreas quotes

2011-08-14T13:02:00.000-07:00

"He discovered his reset button early on and there were not many things that bothered him all the rest of his days just because of that."

"Most people don't know
there are angels
whose only job is to make sure
you don't get too comfortable
and fall asleep and miss your life."

"Everything changed
the day he figured out
there was exactly enough time
for the important things in his life."

"Anyone can slay a dragon, he told me, but try waking up every morning and loving the world all over again. That's what takes a real hero."

- Brian Andreas

Top 5 Plot Principles

2011-08-07T20:08:00.000-07:00

If anyone needs a quick review on plotting, I found this one a few days ago and enjoyed it!

Source: Copyright 2000 by Alicia Rasley
www.sff.net/people/alicia

1. Plausible plotting starts with cause and effect. Make sure each step in your plot has a causative event, and one or more effects. Character actions should be caused by some motivation, and should have some effect on the plot.

2. Your protagonist should save the day (or destroy it). Protagonist is the “first actor”, the character most active in the story. Most importantly, he should be the one who resolves the conflict in the climactic scene. No one else should solve the mystery, or discover the secret, or arrive just in time to save the day. The plot should force the protagonist to make choices and take actions, and the course of plot events should change in response to those choices and actions.

3. Give the protagonist a goal, then take it away. The goal-driven protagonist is an active protagonist, but if you just let the protagonist achieve his goal, you’ll have a linear or two-dimensional plot. Have him lose the goal, or sacrifice it, or achieve it and realize he doesn’t really want it, and you’ll add the complication that makes this a real story.

4. The point of plot is change. The events should cause a change in the protagonist’s inner life, to trade her original goal for a more worthy one, to face a personal issue she’s ignored before, or to resolve a longstanding internal conflict.

5. Lead readers to the story, but don't drag them. Set up your opening scenes so readers are led to ask story questions like “Who killed the film director?” or “What will happen to John and Sue’s love when Sue learns that John has been lying to her?”

Some Words To Pass On

2011-08-04T20:03:00.000-07:00

Certain things are easier for certain people than they are for others. For example, some people take tests with ease while others struggle even after studying.

Today, one of my professors was talking about the ability in each of us to crash and burn. Hit bottom. Fail. Maybe even betray ourselves.

And then she said, "It's not really the bad things happening but the way we react to them. Don't our reactions to difficulties define us as much as anything else? If you haven't gone to the bottom, how do you know how far you can bounce back?"

I've been reading some blogs about people being rejected by agents, friends, etc. I've also read a lot about resilience from these events. It's inspiring in many ways. Not because these individuals have had things come easily to them but because they haven't let those affect their trajectories.

So if anyone is hesitating on whether they should keep going---with this manuscript or that goal or a change----do it. The worst is not that it won't work out. The worst is if you prevent it from letting you become better because of it.

Feelings

2011-08-02T20:18:00.000-07:00

So it turns out that these past few days of absolute relaxation----reality television marathons, ice cream sandwiches, shopping----have been wonderful. People talk about running out of energy but I think we can deplete our emotions as well. Sometimes I forget that when I'm writing. Being in a constant state of anything, positive, negative, or in between, ensures its extinction.

Just today, I emptied a box of memories given to me by an ex-boyfriend, and felt the tears threatening to emerge. Prom pictures (what is it with those prom pictures?!), movie ticket stubs, letters...all of the things that showed what was once there. Reminders of a transient time. Ghost items.

Later, at the mall, I bought some colorful bowls for my new apartment. I also got some new bath products and lipstick. Each item brimmed with possibility.

There was a celebration of endings and beginnings within a few hours. In the space between those, I embraced and discarded feelings as though they were clothing, only to know that it may just take that little something to bring them back.

Quick question for writers...

2011-08-01T21:00:00.000-07:00

When you write a synopsis, do you make it similar to a query letter and discuss what happens in the ending?

Or should they look completely different?

Psychology helps writing

2011-08-01T20:22:00.000-07:00

My sister sent me some wonderful articles from PsychologyToday.com that I wanted to share. Reading psychology articles has helped me with understanding people in real life and in novels.

I think that there's a lot of psychology involved in creating a world and making it believable, don't you?

This article discusses life from an introvert's perspective. (I'm an extrovert but I do think that introverts get an undeserved bad rep at times.)
---One of the articles related to this one explained how an introvert/extrovert couple can still have fun at social events and during their free time. It helped me a lot with my main characters.

Another piece explains what makes a person likeable....this could help in creating a character readers want to root for.

Do you research other topics to help your writing?

Bye, summer

2011-07-28T16:28:00.001-07:00

Bye, summer.

You've taught me:

1. That out of all things worth cultivating, a thick skin may be the most useful right now

2. Some friendships are better with distance

3. Procrastination can be a defense mechanism against fear of failure

4. (but) Failure is the only thing that fosters growth sometimes

5. Spending time worrying about being liked is well, a waste of a lot of time

6. What you're working on is about your own wants. Forget the questions concerning "book deals" and "when are you ever going to finish" and "why would you ever choose to write"

7. When someone chooses to consider your feelings even when they are at the height of emotion, you know you've found a winner

8. If you wait for the perfect time to write, you'll never write. Respect your passion enough to develop it.

9. People tend to already have ideas about who you are and who you'll be. When you step outside of those, they get upset. It's usually out of love and shock, not an intention to hurt.

More Quotes

2011-07-28T16:08:00.000-07:00

"The fading light is us, and we are, for a moment so brief, so beautiful."

-Gary Shteyngart (Super Sad True Love Story)

"If you stop thinking, if you stop wondering, you die."
— Gary Shteyngart (Super Sad True Love Story)

"Gorgeous women don't go to medical school. Unless they're as damaged as they are beautiful."

"Everybody does stupid things, it shouldn't cost them everything they want in life."

-House

Cut it Out?

2011-07-26T14:35:00.000-07:00

Whether it's with a work project or relationship, how do you decide if it's better to just cut it out?

And if you do, does it ever really leave you? When I've deleted some things I've written, the words are gone, yes but sometimes those themes and styles reveal themselves again.

I ask this because I've had to let go of relationships along the way (I'm sure most of us have, whether they're romantic ones or not). But every once in a while, more than I wish, I find myself wondering how this person is doing. Things will remind me of them and the reaction is like a Pavlovian dog: wistfulness, grief, guilt, and doubt. It might be something obvious, like a song we both used to enjoy, or something unexpected, like a cheesy line from Grey's Anatomy.

Time can do tricky things: it can make us think we are more healed than we are while also making things seem more valuable than they are.

But I'm finding that some things are impervious to time. I'm not sure if the things we care about truly ever leave us.

Maybe they do in a broad sense but surely, they leave a fragment behind...

extremes

2011-07-26T14:23:00.000-07:00

The extremes tend to drive me crazy. Right now, it's having either too much time or too little time. Neither of those elicits my most productive, efficient self.

Around this time, when summer is foreshadowing its departure, I start to freak out about whether I've made the most of it. Everything is coated with nostalgia before it's even gone: the grip of a sweaty Starbucks frappuccino, outdoor farmers' markets, sliced mango on tarty frozen yogurt, clear tan lines from flip flops...

And then there's that magic and often irritating word....balance.
That virtue so often talked about (and sought) yet difficult to grasp.

I think I'll stop striving for that at the moment and learn to just be.

Change has never been easy for me, even when it's the cyclical kind.

2011-07-26T14:17:00.000-07:00

"I must tell you something of significance. Fashion is always of the time in which you live. It is not something standing alone. But the grand problem, the most important problem, is to rejuvenate women. To make women look young. Then outlook on life changes. They feel more joyous.

Women have always been the strong ones of the world. The men are always seeking from women a little pillow to put their heads down on. They are always longing for the mother who held them as infants. Women must tell men always that they are the strong ones. They are the big, the strong, the wonderful. In truth, women are the strong ones. It is just my opinion. I am not a professor. I speak my opinions gently. It is the truth for me. I am not young, but I feel young.

The day I feel old, I will go to bed and stay there. J’aime la vie! I feel that to live is a wonderful thing. "

~Coco Chanel

I haven't learned much but I have learned some things...

2011-07-20T00:35:00.000-07:00

1. Summer is the time to embrace laziness and lemonade...it's okay that everything is moving slower

2. When writing anything, get someone else, anyone to look at it. Nothing compares to a fresh pair of eyes and the work can always improve.

(on a similar note, don't start a query with a question unless it's the most compelling question in the world, don't start a book with a dream, and don't write for others...

sincerely,
the girl who learned these the hard way and doesn't want you to do the same)

3. At some point, it becomes fun to be "boring". Sleeping early, eating home cooked food, watching Animal Planet on a Saturday night...

4. You can read for pleasure only or you can read for pleasure and to learn. Only the latter will help you improve your craft.

5. It's wonderful to date a man who challenges you but the real strength and discovery comes with the man who cherishes you as you are
(firm believer in the nice guys finishing first theory)

6. Sometimes the best writing happens when you're not writing

7. Facebook is a great blue land but it usually turns into a bigger waste of time than it should

8. True style is wearing what's best on you not whatever is on the runway

9. Secrets are liberating: the ones we share with those special others, the ones we keep folded in ourselves

10. Keep going...you owe it to yourself

Oh, Audrey...

2011-07-19T01:03:00.000-07:00

"I don't want to be alone, I want to be left alone."

"For beautiful eyes, look for the good in others; for beautiful lips, speak only words of kindness; and for poise, walk with the knowledge that you are never alone."

"I was born with an enormous need for affection, and a terrible need to give it."

"If I get married, I want to be very married."

"When you have nobody you can make a cup of tea for, when nobody needs you, that's when I think life is over."

"You can tell more about a person by what he says about others than you can by what others say about him."

-Audrey Hepburn

What Has Blogging Done For You?

2011-07-14T14:09:00.000-07:00

Did you start a blog for the same reasons you continue you keep one?
How did your role as a blogger evolve?

I've been fortunate to change as a blogger. This space started as an online journal; it took me almost a year to connect with other writers and use it as a place to work on the craft.

My first writer/blogger friend, Laura, continues to write one of my favorite blogs to visit.
The other day when I was revising my query, I realized that I got some of my best pointers from Amparo, who looked at my it earlier this year. She found things that I never could and as a result, helped me write a stronger query.

The more people I meet through this world, the more I feel understood in my goals (and the more I learn about how hard some individuals truly work).
There are many things that I go through that I feel only my fellow bloggers would understand.

Blogging has given me more advice and insight than any class ever could.
Sending e-champagne and cupcakes your way for making the online world an incredible place.
Cheers!

on happiness

2011-07-14T13:45:00.000-07:00

Today, I had a thought:

True happiness requires daily effort, mostly in the form of reminders. When I find myself becoming negative or crestfallen, I have to think of the many things there are to be content about:

-The deep green of an apple
-Friendships that evolve as we do
-Sprinkles on an ice cream cone
-Family: the one we're born with and the one we choose
-The smell of freshly brewed coffee
-Smiles exchanged between strangers
-People who fought for the rights we have now
-Quotes: uplifting ones, lovey dovey ones, motivational ones..
-Coconut scented body wash
-Poetry that demands to be reread

Relying on certain goals to happen gives a false, transient sense of fulfillment. By placing my emotional barometer on things outside myself, I leave it susceptible to everything.

So, yes, happiness is a verb disguised as a noun.

Keep Querying or Move On?

2011-07-12T11:18:00.000-07:00

There is no magic number for how many times one should query, right? So when do you decide if you should keep hunting or if it's time to move on?

Do you rely on a gut feeling or something more palpable to the outside, like a date circled on the calendar?

The thing is, if I had decided to persist with my first attempt at a book, then I wouldn't have been happy, even if it did work out.
Why?
I had no idea what I was doing and as a result, it was terribly written, something better left in the confines of my computer screen. Moving on was the more appropriate thing to do.

For those of you who have put away your work, what made you not want to publish it yourself?

because only fellow bookworms would understand...

2011-07-12T11:09:00.001-07:00

..how incredible The STRAND bookstore is! If you are ever in New York, you must visit. I felt like Belle when the Beast gave her the grand library. Except nobody was giving me this bookstore. And it had a million people crawling through it.
Okay, so it was nothing like Belle.

simple pleasure

2011-07-12T10:46:00.000-07:00

There are few things as wonderful as taking yourself (and a novel) to lunch.

Inspired by: a beautiful young woman I saw sitting at an outdoor restaurant the other day. She wore a sleeveless summer dress, clutched a glass of wine in one hand, and a magazine in the other. As I passed her, I thought, "What a lovely way to spend an afternoon!"

Lately, I've realized that there are many luxuries woven into my days and solitude just may be one of them.

(I know some people abhor the idea of eating alone in public but I think it's a great route towards introspection.)

Getting In Our Own Way

2011-07-07T14:44:00.000-07:00

Photo from: Google images

"I just can't deal with him," my sister said the other day, referring to a potential love interest. "Why? What's wrong with him?"
"He just gets in his own way."
"What do you mean by that?"
"I mean, his problems... so many of them are because he just creates them and doesn't realize how much is in his control."
"Hmm, I wonder if we all do that to an extent..."

I wonder if my doubts, fears, and negative thoughts hinder me before anything else even has the chance to. I wonder if awareness of this is the first step to battling it...

A Swift Kick in the Rear End

2011-07-05T15:25:00.000-07:00

Us writers tend to become emotional. And it's not just in the "I'm happy today" and "sad now" emotional. We set up furniture in our emotions. Build homes around them. Become complacent. Allow them to control us.

Or at least, that's what I've realized I do at low points.

It's wonderful to be patient and kind with yourself, to be understanding when things just don't seem to fit...

But every once in a while, I think I need a kick in the butt.

A stern, rational voice to say, "Get up, get over it, and move on."

The more I learn, the more I see that nothing was ever created without a lot of hard work, disappointment, and a strong desire to give up. Even if it's for a quick flash, I think everyone's flirted with the idea of walking away. What separates this project/relationship/opportunity from the rest is the desire to keep at it when it seems more sane to let go.

Back!

2011-07-04T15:34:00.000-07:00

Hope everyone had a wonderful Fourth (Samir and I watched fireworks from a great rooftop in the city).

I will be resuming my posts this week (and catching up on all of your wonderful blogs...slowly but surely)!

Thank you so much for your support while I was in Africa. The trip changed me as a woman, future physician, and writer. I'm excited to catch up!

African Adventures

2011-06-18T16:50:00.000-07:00

Hey everyone! My first post on the NYTimes blog is up:

http://kristof.blogs.nytimes.com/2011/06/17/win-a-trip-2011-saumya-reports-from-morocco/
(It covers a snippet of the past couple of days. )

The days are bustled, packed with one thing after another, while the nights are occupied with reading and writing. This is the first time I've written in this context (usually it's been in my own home on my own schedule) and I'm seeing what a difference deadlines make when it comes to writing. The more I'm here, the more I realize how much of a luxury even a vice like procrastination is.

There's also something priceless about traveling with people I haven't met before. Those unfamiliar dynamics have forced to unearth new portions of myself, ones that are far from the comfort zone I usually turn to when I get on a plane. I suppose we all seek our new locations and experiences for the chance to become refreshed.

We spent this afternoon traveling from Mauritania to Darkar. I feel like I'm in another world altogether because of how desolate everything is. There are vast, open stretches of sand and camels cross the street with more entitlement than vehicles. Men wear robes that graze the ground while women expose their hair parting at most.

I'm not sure how many of you have been abroad but visiting these countries reminds me of how much I have to be grateful for: air conditioning, hot water any time, hair dryers that don't blow out, Mexican food, and WiFi in most places, to name some.

But most of all, when I see these graceful, elegant women, I once again send a silent pinch of gratitude to the universe for giving me the liberty to express myself.

Thanks so much for encouraging my writing endeavors and giving me the chances to know yours.
Even though we haven't met, I feel blessed to be connected with all of you.

(Pictures from our journey today)

distance to get closer

2011-06-15T17:32:00.000-07:00

Greetings from Casablanca!

Writing's been difficult lately. And I'm more frustrated about the frustration itself than the fact that I haven't been writing as much. Does that make any sense at all?

As I flew to Africa today (more on that later because it's been a surreal and life changing day,), I was sure I'd come to the hotel and fall asleep. The trip was a way to escape my life, the things that occupy my mind, and focus on others.

But the first thing I noticed when we landed was the smell. I turned into my parents, whispering, "It's just like India" every chance I could.
It reeked of hard work and activity. Industrialization. A summer that was never dormant.

Suddenly, everything was new and had to be soaked in. I scribbled in my notebook about the details around me and slowly felt myself crawling out of a shell. Like a long lost friend, writing came back to me, wanting to be pursued.

Then I ate dinner with my incredible travel partners and favorite columnist. We discussed the themes that lay ahead of us, the stories we want to capture while we're here. The gravity of my dreams came into focus.

So as I sit in my hotel room, Arabic television droning in the background, I recognize that we often escape just to return back to our refreshed selves.

nights into mornings

2011-06-15T17:16:00.001-07:00

Photo from cruise deck

As I've said before, I'm not a morning person. I cringe at the sound of my alarm, wake up at the last minute, and rush out the door with a granola bar in hand.
Nights are better (for me). Everyone's asleep. It feels intimate to just be with my words or a classic movie.

But on the last evening of the cruise, a couple of us decided to stay up to watch the night evolve into the morning.

The colors came slowly, each making its own appearance, using the sky as a canvas. Light pinks, purples, blues..
Like most people, I was seduced with the shades but more than that, I caught a vivid glimpse of what I'd been missing, avoiding. The hush of the world. One so deep that it revives you, makes you want to connect with that sense of serenity in you. I grasped a heightened sense of my insignificance while at the same time acknowledging the tangible place that I held in this world.

And all was well.

So, yes, I will always be a night person but there is something renewing about the morning.

"You should have seen that sunrise
With your own eyes
Brought me back
To life"
John Mayer

bachelorette fun

2011-06-15T17:11:00.001-07:00

There are few things as wonderful as celebrating your friend's dream come true. This past week, I went on a cruise for a lovely bachelorette party. There were shirts that said "Setting Sail Before the Veil." There were cheers at every meal. There were games and giggles.

And I couldn't be happier for her.